Glossary
When I started writing this blog, I had no idea how I would categorize my posts. The usual movies, music, rant, travel taxonomy just did not appeal to me for one reason – it made sense. There was way too much cold logic in that for my taste. I prefer logic served with hot chocolate fudge and sprinkled with dried cannabis leaves for good effect. So I decided to use Madras Tamil terms.
Then something even stranger happened. Readers. People who were actually willing to spend time reading my blog and actually leaving comments on my posts. I look at some of the comments, and I realize that there is far more humour and wisdom in them than in my posts. Here is a very small sampler of some of the creative brilliance I get in the comments section.
- Contemporary Tamil Linguistics – by Vasooo
- Hyderabaadi Lingo – by Thoppai Mama
- Carnatic Transliterations – by Munimma, Poet Laureate
- Limericks – by Rambodoc, a wickedly funny surgical knife wielder
- Iyeresque Speculations on the Bard – by Bikerdude, Pisth Polyglot from Pangalore
So my silly experiment in absurd post categorization continued and the terms started to multiply at a rate slightly faster than a standard Madras auto meter.
Thus, this glossary
amit_123
amit_123 was a term coined by Harish as a South Indian generalization for all North Indians who migrate to Madras to join IT companies. It is intended as a limited-scope counterpoint to the term “Madraasi”. The bogus theory that justifies this term is of course:
All North Indian men are named Amit
So the standard cliches are:
- amit_123 is rude to waiters
- amit_123 hates Chennai’s weather
- amit_123 can’t tolerate the fact that nobody understands Hindi in Chennai
- amit_123 just cannot locate edible chappathi in Chennai
- amit_123 misses ogling at the figures in his hometown
- amit_123’s first criteria for a good actor is a six pack
- And more. No wait. amit_123 prefers lassi
Some subspecies include cool_amit (bon-vivant raconteur types) and amit_just4u (Orkut stalker types)
Sample conversations demonstrating the use of amit_123:
“Dei. He is a sariyaana amit_123” (Hey, he is a clearly defined amit_123)
“Vantaangada amit_123s. Avanga rousu thaangamudiyaadhu. Pona vaaram Murugan Idli kadai waiteroda orey sandai” ( Here they come, the amit_123s. Their specific type of rousu is utterly intolerable. Last week, they were fighting with the waiter at Murugan Idli store)
Jalsa
It all started with this word. A noun that suggests all manner of naughty, risque things, but I mostly use the word as an adjective to describe activities that not so much as cause jaws to be dropped as eyebrows to be raised with a look of slight bemusement.
Example of non-jalsa activity – playing the guitar.
Example of Jalsa activity – wearing banian/lungi and playing Iron Maiden’s Fear of the Dark riff.
Posts categorized as jalsa will tend to refer to such activities
Jilpa
Showing Jilpa refers to talking a lot about stuff one has no clue about. For example, 10 years ago, a particularly orthodox relative of mine (unfortunately elderly to boot) visited us and I did the customary namaskaram (near feet fallings, blessings gettings) exercise so that he would pass on the essence of his good experiences to me. The theory is irrational, but it’s also good exercise. I usually use it as an excuse to do a pushup.
As I was about to finish and get back to playing Grand Theft Auto, he held me back and asked me to recite the Abhivaadaye. To the uninitiated, that is a formal introduction composed in Sanskrit taught to a boy when they put a thread on him. It generally goes – “I salute thee, I, from Sage Bhargava’s school, learning the Yajur Veda, chapter 4, named Ashok sharma….”.
In short, I had to introduce myself as a Veda learning, gurukul imprisoned, model citizen circa 1300 BC when really speaking, I was a heavy metal loving, engineering college bunking, average student circa 1997. Why, I asked? Tradition, he said. I told him that I do not want to introduce myself as somebody I was not. I promised to do some research, and create my own Abhivaadaye based on reality and get back to him.
I came up with “Abhivaadaye, Delhi Vishwavidhyaye, Anutantra Abhiyanthrike, Krishnan evam Rajeswari puthre, Bhaara Loha Sangeetha rasike, Aham, Ashok, asmi Bhoho”
Panini did not just turn in his grave. He woke up as a zombie and sent a Terminator-2000 into the future to eliminate me. It was wrong grammar in an unholy union with poor vocabulary to produce a sentence that could cause an entire language’s downfall.
That, on the other hand, was a good example of “showing jilpa”. Posts categorized as jilpa will tend to involve convoluted stories around simple things.
Matter
Nothing expresses “What is the problem dude? Is anything wrong? Can I help?” in fewer words than the Chennai Tamil “Enna Matter?”
Posts categorized as matter will tend to vaguely and approximately refer to real life or serious stuff. No guarantees though
deathbypowerpoint
Anything related to work, boredom and other soul sapping activities will be categorized as deathbypowerpoint.
Ooru Sutthal
Translation – Places Roamings. In short – Travelogues
Sappaadu
Translation – Food. Although in TN, Sappaadu refers to any kind of food as long as it involves rice. Everything else is “Tiffen”.
Totoro
Being a hot blooded, Aries alpha (ok. gamma perhaps) male, I cannot use the word “cute” without suffering from an aneurysm. So I use “Totoro” instead. Those who know Miyazaki will understand me. Those who don’t, see this
That is a Totoro. Posts requiring me to use the 4-letter “c” word will use this category instead.
Pattinam
Pattinam is an archaic word for Chennai. It comes from a contraction of Chennappanaickapattinam, which apparently once caused East company officials to suffer from mouth paralysis trying to say it. All posts related to my home town will be categorized as Pattinam
Gilma
Strange stuff. Irrational stuff. Like Himesh, Shiv Sena and Soap serials.
Trackbacks & Pingbacks
- Glossary « Doing Jalsa and Showing Jilpa
- The Jilpa Guide to organizing a World Food Festival « Doing Jalsa and Showing Jilpa
- Temple Matters « Doing Jalsa and Showing Jilpa
- Thoughts from India - Part 1 « News you can’t use !
- Muqablech : Part Deux » NITTians.com
- Muqablech : Part Deux « Man ish a social animal
finally a page i can direct the next person who asks me why my vocabulary has become extra colorful…
Lol.
Wonderful ! Am in splits.
You have the knack to make others laugh. A great plus.
Voracious Blog Reader
Ranjit and Voracious Blog reader,
Thank you
Very good explanation about jalsa and jilpa ..it made me to give a biggg smile in my face
Sowmya,
Thank you
Death by powerpoint – couldn’t have had a better category!! Rock on.
Goyal,
Thank you
Well, now I know what jalsa, jilpa and gilma mean or stand for.
vaathiyaare, nanri.
More Gilma at
http://www.gilmagroup.com/
Your Abhivaadaye is too good. I hope I too can come up with something like this.
lol
Sexy abhivadaye, and in the old geezer’s face is just tooo good. I bow down to thee.
Excuse to do a push up… Oh man… You give a new meaning to loose pillai…
Me also an Aries Male…..find it awkward to use “Cute” …but I have learnt from many “Groundnut sessions” that the four letter word starting with ‘c’ is the main keyword to be used….I have some somehow managed to live with the awkwardness…unlike u ..u seem to have coined a new word to suit ur cosmic sign
//It was wrong grammar in an unholy union with poor vocabulary to produce a sentence that could cause an entire language’s downfall.//
Thats like the same dialogue in Anniyan – “This is an unnecessary question irrelevant to the current situation” (what Ambi says to the SI who man handles the rogue) Chanceless man! Eager to meet you!
Hey This is awesome!
I am a tambram but born and brought up in Bombay, so my tamil is very different from the Madras tamil. (Sad but true is that my Marathi is better than my Tamil.. though i did learn to read and write tamil for 4 years). So now i can learn the Madras Tamil.. thanks to your blog.
Nanri!!!!
konjam comments apparam thank you solrada niruthitezh nu theriyudu
why don’t you put funda on tina_123?
Hi Ashok. I have been a silent reader of all your posts. Not only posts but also all those restaurant reviews. Really enjoy your writing, all the madras bashai and slang and everything. Keep posting….sirikka vekkareenga sila time sindikavum vekkareenga…..most of the times, the posts synch with what i would have thought casually….so feels good when I read. Kudos.
Apparently, somewhere in the north, they refer to southies as ‘makaalu’ people. And that, it is said in a derogatory way, a laughing northie told me. I am very much from south, and would like if you’d start the process of coming up with a “powerful” word for collective-northies, which cannot be but derogatory
“Chennappanaickapattinam, which apparently once caused East company officials to suffer from mouth paralysis trying to say it”
ashok anna… really good
brilliant stuff! love your writing.
Just
S00per Glossary… I liked that Jilpa part especially… enga dictionary la jalsa, jilpa, gilma la vera pa..